DYNAMIC OF LEADERSHIP - Reflection Week 7 (Communication, coaching and conflict skills)

 Reflection Week 7 (Communication, coaching and conflict skills) 

The seventh class of Dynamics of Leadership was held on Tuesday, 30^th April 2024 with a topic of ‘Communication, coaching and conflict skills.’ Prof Jamilah started the class with showing an abstract picture of one lady as per below picture;

For my 1^st attempt see this picture, I see a picture of young lady wearing a scarf with a necklace and with her eyes closed. I can’t see the old lady until my classmate told they saw an old lady. Another picture sharing by Prof is about how many logs in the picture? From the left side guy informed four logs, but from the right side was seen in three logs. So, from this situation we can see that, different people will the things with different perspective. Different peoples tell different stories and if the do not want to sit and discuss the arguments and to communicate effectively, then it brings to the conflict for each other. So, communication is very important to the leader. Next slide is about the ‘communication’.

Communication is a crucial aspect of effective leadership. It involves the exchange of information, ideas, thoughts, and feelings between a leader and their team members. Good communication skills are essential for leaders to convey their vision, goals, expectations, and feedback clearly and effectively.

There are seven essential communication skills for effective leadership adapted from the blog [https://blog.acesence.com/effective-communication-skills-for-managers-in-the-workplace-and-how-to-improve-them/].

Interpersonal Communication	·         Get to know your team and their interests. ·         Be aware of diversity and preferences. ·         Demonstrate care concern, and cultural sensitivity in the communication process.
Non-verbal communication	·         Ensure congruence and alignment between your verbal and nonverbal. ·         Maintain eye contact to appropriately enhance communication. ·         Engage the audience visually to retain their attention.
Leadership storytelling	·         Enhance the effectiveness of your fact-based sharing by leveraging leadership storytelling skills. ·         Keep to one core idea per communication, as a confused audience indicates poor communication. ·         Create a culture of trust by genuinely engaging and involving people through compelling stories.
Listening skills	·         Seek to understand and ask clarifying questions. ·         Paraphrase what you have heard to indicate that you are listening, increasing the sense of empathy. ·         Listen without passing judgment or forcing your ideas or suggestions.
Comprehension and synthesis	·         Communicate something complex in a simple way. ·         Reduce the use of jargon and fancy words in your presentations. ·         Highlight the learning point and connections that the audience must get.
Affirmation skills	·         Look out for what your team has done right and appreciate them. ·         Praise them immediately. If not, maintain a record so you won’t forget the details. ·          Be specific about your praise and let them know you see their efforts.
Communicating concisely	·         Write down the key points you want to communicate. Keep to just a few important ones. ·         List down the possible objections, and think about how to overcome them ·         State your assumptions about the listeners. For instance, what are their prior beliefs about what you will communicate? How will you close this gap?

 

Overall, effective communication is essential for successful leadership. It helps leaders build strong relationships with their team members, foster collaboration, inspire trust, and drive performance towards achieving common goals. Good communication skills can enhance a leader's ability to influence, motivate, and guide their team effectively.

I hope these 7 key points will guide me to improve my communications skills within organization that I work now and might be useful in daily life too because communication is very important in our life. We live with people and not live alone in this world.

For next slide, Prof Jamilah asked ‘What is the first step to send a message?’ The first step is to plan your message; what is the purpose of message? to whom? how? when? And where? By following these steps to plan your message, we can increase the likelihood of effectively communicating our ideas and achieving our communication goals. But, before sending the message, take the time to review and revise it for clarity, accuracy, and professionalism. Check for spelling and grammar errors, ensure that all necessary information is included.

For the next slide is about ‘Oral message sending process’. Prof Jamilah explain the five steps in the oral message-sending process are (1) develop rapport; (2) state your communication objective; (3) transmit your message; (4) check the receiver’s understanding; and (5) get a commitment and follow up.

Let’s create an example of a well-structured oral message. Imagine you’re giving a presentation about the benefits of regular exercise. Here’s how you might structure your message:

Title: “The Importance of Regular Exercise”

1.    Introduction:

Begin with a friendly greeting: “Good morning, everyone!”

State your purpose: “Today, I’d like to discuss the importance of incorporating regular exercise into our daily lives.”

2.    Body:

Point 1: Physical Health Benefits

“First, let’s talk about the physical health benefits.”

Explain how exercise improves cardiovascular health, strengthens muscles, and helps maintain a healthy weight.

Provide examples: “Regular exercise reduces the risk of heart disease, diabetes, and obesity.”

Point 2: Mental Health Benefits

“Next, let’s explore the mental health benefits.”

Discuss how exercise releases endorphins, reduces stress, and improves mood.

Share a personal anecdote or a relevant study: “Exercise can alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression.”

Point 3: Social Benefits

“Lastly, consider the social benefits.”

Mention group activities, sports, or fitness classes.

Highlight the opportunity to connect with others: “Joining a running club or yoga class fosters social interaction.”

Transition:

“In summary, regular exercise positively impacts both our physical and mental

well-being.”

3.    Conclusion:

Recap the main points: “We’ve discussed the physical, mental, and social benefits of exercise.”

End with a call to action: “Let’s commit to incorporating exercise into our daily routines!”

Thank your audience: “Thank you for listening.”

Remember to adjust the content and tone based on your audience and the specific context. Practice delivering your message confidently, and you’ll engage your listeners effectively!

Next slide from Prof Jamilah is about ‘Message Receiving Process’. It contains phase of listening, analyzing and check understanding. For listening, I am sure that we want people to pay attention when we speak to them and we avoid any disruption. We don’t interrupt and watch the nonverbals, ask questions and we do take note. Next for analyzing, we should think and evaluate after listening. We do check understanding with paraphrase and watch the nonverbals. What is paraphrase actually? Paraphrasing is the act of restating someone else's ideas or information in your own words. It involves rephrasing a passage from a source text while retaining the original meaning.

Paraphrasing is a valuable skill in effective communication that can help us convey information clearly, avoid plagiarism, promote active listening, and improve understanding and retention of key ideas. By incorporating paraphrasing into our communication practices, we can enhance the quality and impact of our messages. When paraphrasing is done correctly, communication effectiveness improves drastically.

Next slide is about ‘Feeback’, where the feedback is the process verifying the messages and determined the objectives are being met. It should be positive or negative. If we receive negative feedback, it shows that a criticism about what happened and as a good leader, we should not avoid the criticism but we should handle the situation by asking the reason and search for best solution.

For the next discussion is about ‘Coaching’. Coaching in leadership refers to the practice of guiding, supporting, and developing individuals to help them achieve their full potential as leaders. Prof Jamilah show slide about 10 coaching guidelines as below;

Coaching is important for several reasons and need guidelines (as per slideshow above). From all the guidelines provided, by effective coaching will improve self-awareness and growth within the employee affected. It promotes self-awareness by helping leaders gain a deeper understanding of their strengths, weaknesses, values, and leadership style. Through introspection, feedback, and reflection, leaders can identify areas for improvement and make positive changes to enhance their effectiveness as leaders.

There are many advantages in coaching approach. Coaching encourages leaders to set specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals to drive progress and growth. Coaches hold leaders accountable for their actions, monitor their progress, and provide feedback to help them stay focused and motivated in achieving their objectives. With additional, leadership coaching empowers leaders to take ownership of their development and drive positive change within themselves and their organizations. Coaches inspire and motivate leaders to challenge themselves, embrace new opportunities, and lead with confidence and authenticity. By providing ongoing support, feedback, and guidance, coaching can help leaders enhance their performance, overcome obstacles, and achieve their full potential. Effective leadership coaching can lead to increased productivity, engagement, and success within the organization.

Next slide is about ‘Mentoring’. Mentoring in leadership is a developmental relationship in which a more experienced or knowledgeable individual (the mentor) provides guidance, support, advice, and feedback to a less experienced or junior individual (the mentee) to help them grow and develop as leaders. Mentoring is a form of one-on-one relationship that focuses on the personal and professional development of the mentee, with the goal of enhancing their leadership skills, knowledge, and capabilities. From Prof Jamilah slide, mentoring is a long term, more involved and personal than coaching. Leadership mentoring enables mentees to see what great leadership looks like, as the mentor is technically leading them; using soft leadership skills to effectively communicate; leadership skills to encourage them and drive them forward, and hard leadership skills to hold them accountable for real progress [https://mentorloop.com/blog/leadership-mentoring-effective-leaders/#SnippetTab   ].

Photo from www.betterup.com 

I did some research and found this website [https://www.betterup.com/blog/how-to-be-a-mentor] is very informative about mentoring. I share about 6 mentoring tips for being a good mentor;

Photo from www.betterup.com 

Get clarity on what the mentee needs

Asking the mentee questions is the first step to gaining clarity about what they need. When you ask questions, you’re uncovering who they are and what patterns they have. Then you can use their answers to guide them on their path to self-discovery. You should also teach the mentee to ask themselves questions. And to use their own insight to answer them well. This way, they’ll have the tools they need to be independent and successful.

Dig Deeper

After you’ve asked some basic questions, it’s time to dig a little deeper with probing questions. The goal is to uncover why they feel or believe a certain way so that you know how to help them. This also helps you discover if any roadblocks might get in the way of their success.

Brainstorm Ideas

Once you’ve asked enough questions to understand your mentee’s mission, it’s time to brainstorm ideas. This is a great opportunity to brainstorm ideas together to co-create the mentee’s future. For instance, let’s say the mentee wants to change careers but is unsure what path to take. You can conduct an exercise together to help them find their dream career.

Share Stories

Sharing stories is a great way to illustrate an idea or lesson. Stories show the mentee that you understand what they’re going through. They also help you build a personal connection with the mentee. For instance, let’s say your mentee is struggling to get along with their manager. You can share a story about how you struggled with a previous manager and how you got through it.

Create a Plan

Once you’ve gotten to know the mentee well, make an action plan to help them reach their goals. Do they want to be a lawyer? Create education and career goals. Then, discuss internship possibilities. Are they a new hire at your company? Create a training plan. Then, have them shadow another employee.

Introduce them to your network

A great way to help a mentee boost their career is by introducing them to your network. This isn’t required, but it can be rewarding for both of you. If you’re on board, consider being choosy with who you introduce them to. And make sure you get permission from both parties beforehand. For instance, let’s say your mentee is trying to decide between being a financial advisor and a loan officer. While it may be tempting to introduce them to everybody, try targeting people in those two fields. Then, give the mentee space to develop those relationships over time.

 

For next slide from Prof Jamilah, is about ‘Conflict’ in leadership. Conflict management style refers to the approach or strategy that an individual uses to address and resolve conflicts in a given situation. Different people may have different preferences and tendencies when it comes to managing conflicts, and understanding one's own conflict management style can help in effectively navigating and resolving conflicts in various settings, including the workplace, personal relationships, and other social interactions. I shared Prof Jamilah slide here for further understanding; There are 5 which are accommodating (friendly helper), collaborating (problem solver), negotiating/compromising (manoeuvring conciliator), avoiding (impersonal complier) and forcing/competitive (tough battler).

Slide for ‘Conflict Management Styles’ from Prof Jamilah

Below is the explanation about five primary conflict management styles, as identified by Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann in their Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI):

Collaborating/integrating (problem solver)	This style involves working together with the other party to find a mutually beneficial solution that satisfies the interests of both parties. Collaborators seek to understand the underlying needs and concerns of all parties involved and strive to find creative win-win solutions. This style is effective in complex situations that require a high level of cooperation and creativity.
Accommodating (friendly helper)	Accommodators prioritize maintaining relationships and satisfying the needs of the other party over their own interests. They are willing to concede, cooperate, and adapt to the demands of others to preserve harmony and avoid escalation. This style can be useful when preserving relationships is more important than winning the conflict.
Negotiating/compromising (manoeuvring conciliator)	In this style, individuals seek to find a middle ground or a mutually acceptable solution by making concessions and finding a balance between their own interests and the interests of the other party. Compromisers are willing to give up some of their goals to reach a quick resolution. This style is useful when time constraints or temporary solutions are needed.
Avoiding (impersonal complier)	Avoiders prefer to sidestep or ignore conflicts altogether, either by withdrawing from the situation, postponing the discussion, or avoiding confrontation. This style may be appropriate when the issue is trivial, emotions are running high, or when the potential risks of addressing the conflict outweigh the benefits.
Forcing/competitive (tough battler)	In this style, individuals assert their own needs, goals, and viewpoints without considering the concerns of others. They may use power, authority, or persuasive tactics to win the conflict, often at the expense of the other party's interests. This style is appropriate when quick decisions are needed, in emergencies, or when unpopular actions need to be taken.

 

From the five conflict styles, ‘Collaborating/integrating’ is the best one for effective leader to solve any conflict in the organizations. But it also depends on the situation, the individuals involved, and the organizational culture. In some cases, other conflict management styles such as compromising or accommodating may be more appropriate or necessary. The key is to understand the unique dynamics of each conflict and choose the most suitable approach to achieve positive outcomes and promote a culture of constructive conflict resolution within the organization.

 

The last slide is about ‘Arbitrator’. What is arbitrator? This is the first time I heard this word.

In the context of leadership, an arbitrator is a person who serves as a neutral third party to help resolve conflicts and disputes between individuals or groups within an organization. The role of an arbitrator is to listen to the perspectives of all parties involved, analyze the issues at hand, and facilitate a fair and impartial resolution that is acceptable to all parties.

Leaders who take on the role of an arbitrator demonstrate strong conflict resolution skills, impartiality, and the ability to remain neutral and objective in addressing disagreements and disputes. They act as mediators or facilitators in guiding the parties toward a mutually agreeable solution, often through open communication, negotiation, and problem-solving techniques.

Prof Jamilah as usual ended the lecture by her inspiring word to remember, ‘In the world you can be anything, be kind, in life always remember, what you give, you get back’. Thank you, Prof Jamilah, for keeping reminder us to always be kind in whatever we do in life.